Unsolicited Advice for the Boston Red Sox

(Photo/Courtesy of Shanyn Kelly Walsh)

Boston Red Sox win their games when my sister attends;

They should give her tickets - free (plus extras for her friends.)

Don't know how she does it...  Could it be her Irish luck?

I just know that, when she's there, the Red Sox do not suck.

The Red Sox & The Bright Side of Reno

I don't plan to watch the Red Sox anymore this year;

It's no fun to see a team I've always held so dear

Flounder through a season - piling loss on top of loss -

Now, with renovations going, I don't give a toss.

Once I'd be depressed that Boston's season's shot to hell,

This year I don't have the time or energy to dwell.

Hopefully, by football season, all of this is done

And sports news is all about the games New England's won.

Worst to First to Worst

Worst to first, now worst again...  The Sox are in a slide

And, if you're a Boston fan, it's been a bumpy ride.

Like a roller coaster getting stuck up on the track,

Red Sox lost key players and have, clearly, felt their lack.

Add the fact the bottom of the line-up cannot hit;

That does not help out the Red Sox' cause a single bit.

Almost everyone, it seems, is in a hitting slump.

Now that we're 11 back, there's players that we'll dump.

Rumor has it Peavy's leaving - maybe Stephen Drew.

Hard to guess, exactly, what Ben Cherington will do.

Normally I'd worry that a rhyme from me's a jinx

But things can't get any worse...  This Red Sox season stinks.

I Wish the Pats Were More Like the Sox

Red Sox gave Big Papi an extension for a year

Making it extremely likely he'll retire here.

Glad they gave him what he asked for; I think it's his due.

Wouldn't want to see him leaving Boston.  How 'bout you?

Good thing that it isn't football that Big Papi plays.

Not a lot of loyalty in Foxborough these days.

We don't pay our stars what they deserve and so they leave us.

Even though I'm thrilled that we are signing Darrelle Revis,

Wilfork wants to be released and  I'm still missing Wes.

Thank gods we kept Edelman.  Does Brady need him?  Yes.

Patriots play hard-ball but I'm glad the Sox did not;

Boston owes Big Papi and the Red Sox quite a lot.

Photo/Courtesy of The Boston Globe

The World Champion Boston Red Sox

Congratulations to the World Champion Boston Red Sox! (Photo/yahoo.news.com)

 

When the final strike was thrown, the Fenway crowd went wild.

Koji Uehara leaped around just like a child.

All the bearded Boys of Summer charged him on the mound.

Red Sox Nation won at home and made a joyful sound.

Dirty Water thundered on the speakers; no one heard.

I know there were speeches made but didn't catch a word.

Not 'til "Cooperstown" stepped up to chants of MVP...

(That's the latest nickname for Ortiz; our Big Papi)

"It's our bleeping city... and remember, Boston Strong!"

No one thought they had a chance this Spring.  Sox proved 'em wrong.

Boston's Red Sox are World Champions - again!  Three cheers!

This must be how Yankees' fans have felt for all those years.

The Boston Red Sox - Fear the Beard.

Somewhere over the rainbow.  (Photo/Red Sox)

Last night, when Jon Lester got the start and took the mound,

Game 1 of the Series played on Fenway's hallowed ground,

Pitching was amazing; held the Cardinals to 1.

Red Sox hitters came alive to score us 8...  We won!

My B hat is blue and red and yet, at heart, it's pink...

And, since I am superstitious, I've begun to think

Part of why we're winning is connected to the beard.

Yes, I know that's crazy but we Boston fans are weird.

I look at the evidence; the balls that bounced away,

Watched as umps reversed a call - don't see that every day -

Saw a pitcher call a ball and then just stand and stare.

Pretty clear to me; the sports gods must like facial hair.

Joy in Mudville

Fans across New England have been overwhelmed with joy.

Last night, sports gods treated our emotions like a toy;

Patriots and Red Sox looked like they were gonna lose.

Brady threw an interception, late, and I heard boos. 

Many left - convinced New Orleans' victory was sealed...

Half the seats were empty when the Pats drove down the field.

Just 10 seconds on the clock, New England down by 4,

Brady threw to Thompkins in the end zone for the score.

If that win was not enough, next up - the Red Sox game.

They had lost the night before and this looked much the same;

Tigers' pitchers managing to shut the Red Sox down...

Not a lot of hitting for the fans in their hometown.

Outlook wasn't brilliant for the home-team but, once more

(Kinda like the Patriots - the Red Sox down by 4)

With the bases loaded Papi stepped up to the plate;

People held their breath - and prayed - in homes throughout the state.

Unlike poor old Casey at the Bat, this mighty swing

Sent the ball out deep to right where Hunter got a ding

Trying to prevent the tying Grand Slam by Ortiz,

Missed the ball...  Which sent the Red Sox Faithful to their knees.

Red Sox won it 6 to 5 and I'm still out of breath...

Both my teams in games where they were looking close to death.

Both teams, with a miracle, came back and got the wins.

Now their fans wear disbelieving, but triumphant, grins.

The Boston Pink Hat* Sports Report

"Do not get your hopes too high this year," sportscasters said.

But, although it's early yet, the Red Sox are ahead.

"This is a rebuilding year...  They'll finish close to last."

Maybe so but, out the gate, they're off and running fast.

Pitching's been amazing; Papi's stats are off the chart.

It's been years since Red Sox fans have seen this kind of start.

Could be, with the pressure off, the Sox are having fun

Then, before they realize it, they've gone out and won.

Celtics play the Knicks tonight; a game we have to win.

I just follow basketball once play-off games begin,

So - I'm not an expert - but I'll put my faith in Pierce

And I guarantee that competition will be fierce.

Bruins won last night; they beat the Maple Leafs by 3.

Boston's TD Banknorth Garden is the place to be.

Seems like every night a play-off game gets underway.

Where, but here, do sports fans get to see such great teams play?

*Pink hat fans are - almost always - women who are drunk.
Give a basic, baseball-knowledge quiz to them - they'd flunk.
They will pick a favorite player based on if he's cute.
Ask them if their team just won - they couldn't give a hoot.

The Boston Red Sox - Reflections From a Pink Hat

Red Sox fans, this morning, are still reeling from the news;

And I don't mean at the fact that our team didn't lose.

I am speaking of the trades...  They've gone and cleared the deck. 

Blew it up in hopes of seeing salvage from the wreck.

Even Pink Hat fans, like me, have given this team up.

Do we think there's more to do to fix the problems? Yup.

Don't know how it happened; who's deserving of the blame...

But the Pesky funeral attendance was a shame.

Papi, Salty, Buchholz and Padilla - those 4 went.

Maybe no-one realized the message that was sent...

In a town like Boston, where a lot of Irish live,

Blowing off a legend is a sin we don't forgive.

Nomar came and Youk sent his regrets...  He had to play.

They displayed the spirit missing from the team today.

Papi seems to have it and I'm sorry that he's hurt.

Season's over anyway. He should hang up his shirt.

Let him rest, then bring him back next year to lead the team.

Hope that he'll step up to be the Keeper of the Dream.

Baseball here in Boston isn't just about the stats...

Not when half your audience is watching in pink hats.

The Boston Red Sox - Yankees. Damn.

Coming to the All-Star break, the Red Sox tied for last;

Found the weekend painful but my husband had a blast.

For he is a Yankees' fan while I support the Sox...

Latest series nearly put our marriage on the rocks.

43 and 43 - it isn't looking good.

Meanwhile, Youk's the hero in his newest neighborhood.

Almost all our stars are beaten up - except Ortiz.

Sports gods, keep him healthy. I am asking nicely. Please!

Poor old Bobby Valentine is struggling, but still

Manages to do the best with what he's got.  He will,

One day, be forgiven for the Kevin Youkilis trade...
Clearly, I am one of those who wishes Youk had stayed.

I know I am not alone - Obama learned it too

When his joke about the trade was greeted with a "Boo!"

Shouldn't tease a Red Sox fan who's team's not doing well.

If you do then be prepared to turn and run like hell.

Sense of humor tends to fade, as Mr. S. just learned

Offers of affection - made by him towards me - were spurned,

After he had dared to wish that Youk became a Yankee...

Not a chance that he was getting any hanky-panky.

The Boston Red Sox - Fenway@100: An Almost Perfect Day

Fenway 100 Mosaic photo

Fenway's birthday celebration? Almost perfect day;

Blue skies, in the 70s, as things got under way.

When the stream of legends started coming through the door,

Stepping past the warning track - continuing to pour

Out onto the emerald grass of that historic field

Under their own power - mostly - 'though some guys were wheeled.

Greeted by the roaring crowds as one by one they came

Stepping to the spot they'd held back when they played the game;

All the players Red Sox fans have loved throughout the years...

(When Francona strolled on out my eyes filled up with tears.)

Far too many men to name; the famous and the not

Felt, again, the gratitude that Red Sox Nation's got

For the boys of summer who will, sometimes, break our hearts -

Like they're doing now, as this new season slowly starts.

Yes, the day was perfect if we just ignore the end.

Losing to the Yankees on our birthday hurt, my friend.