Kitchen Renovation - Day 70

Hallelujah! Thank you God (and Bob)...  I have a sink.

Fridge is making ice and filtered water we can drink.

I've been washing all the dirty dishes we've accrued,

Testing out the under-mounted seal that Top Line glued.

I've used paper plates so much I must've killed a grove.

Next, although it's greedy, I am praying for a stove.

Cooking on an outdoor grill's begun to lose its charm;

 I've now reached the stage where I'm prepared to trade an arm

Just to cook a meal indoors and not out in the rain...

Sorry.  I am also sick of hearing me complain.

I will just be happy that my sink has been installed -

And try to be patient 'til the electrician's called.

Congratulations Mr. Speaker

(Image and lyrics/Courtesy of Disney's Song of the South)

With Pope Francis' audience, and all his sins absolved,

Plus his resignation, Speaker Boehner's problem's solved.

Good for him...  I worried when his nerves began to fray.

Now, perhaps, he'll dry his eyes and wipe his tears away.

GOP is self-destructing. Who would want his job:

Trying to pass legislation with an angry mob,

Catering to bigots - because they're the ones who vote?

His relief caused Boehner to start singing, and I quote;

"Oh, zip a dee doo dah...  What a wonderful day."

Judging by his jaunty step, I think he'll be okay.

Now that it's the far right-wing who will control the Floor,

It's the rest of us whom I've begun to worry for.

Pardon the Rant

 Top Line Granite stocks a lot of very pretty slabs

But, if your decision where to shop is up for grabs,

I'd suggest you find another granite store to use;

They are not the place that I would recommend you choose.

Top Line didn't keep in touch; they don't return your call,

Couldn't get the Ceasarstone they'd promised to install,

Didn't send the templater my builder asked them to...

He was here three weeks ago and these guys still aren't through.

Poor Tom Brady

If you've ever doubted or were sitting on the fence,

Unsure whether football injures brains, more evidence

Surfaced when Tom Brady said he'd vote for Donald Trump...

Sacks on my poor quarterback did worse than leave a lump.

Only explanation I can find is CTE:

Chronic and traumatic brain encephalopathy.

If Tom hadn't been concussed, thus damaging his brain,

He would not support the Donald, 'cause that's just insane.

Donald Trump would make a truly, awful President

(Guess we know where hot air from deflated footballs went.) 

We can't blame Tom Brady - still the greatest of all time -

But, what football does to players' brains should be a crime.

#IStandWithAhmed

Freshman, from MacArthur High in Texas, built a clock.

Showed it to his teachers who, to that poor freshman's shock,

Called police, believing that he'd brought a bomb to school.

Ahmed was interrogated, all because some fool

Couldn't tell a nerdy kid apart from terrorists.

So, in NASA tee-shirt and with hand-cuffs on his wrists,

Five cops took Ahmed Mohamed off to Juvie Hall

Where, at last, they let the kid give mom and dad a call.

He's still facing charges but he's home...  Not in a cell.

'though the school's suspended him, perhaps it's just as well;

Doesn't sound as if they've got a lot to offer him...

Faculty has demonstrated that they're rather dim.

Kitchen Renovation - Day 56

I think I've been patient but my patience just ran out...

Two months now without a sink and I've begun to doubt

That our kitchen renovation's ever getting done.

Trust me when I say this process isn't any fun.

No one but our great designer (God bless Lisa Green)

Seems to care how long it's been or how I'm gonna clean

Pots and pans and cutting boards in my small, bathroom sink...

With no stove, preparing meals is harder than you'd think.

Still, I've tried to make it work with paper cups and plates,

Tripping over boxes and appliances in crates,

Waiting for our countertops... Then, yesterday, I heard

They won't be arriving here until the 23rd.

"Just a couple days," they said.  Yet, that will make 19.

And, although I wanted to, I didn't make a scene...

But I'd recommend you undergo a change of heart

If you've been considering a renovation start.

All We Are Saying - The Iran Deal

(Courtesy of Steve Sack/www.cagle.com)

Watch for all the posturing that we are bound to see;

Congress members covering their butts politically

When a vote that's veto proof for dealing with Iran

Comes up, though not one of them has got a better plan.

They'll make lots of empty threats about what they would do

If they'd been negotiating, arguing, in lieu

Of agreement with the Russians, Chinese, Germans, Brits

They'd have made Iran comply or blown the place to bits.

I, for one, prefer that we should take a chance on peace

Hoping that, in 10 years time, Iran will choose to cease

Working towards a weapon but, until somebody tries,

We miss any chance to forge a lasting compromise.

The New England Patriots... Whatever.

Looks as if the secret's out on how the Pats prepare

For opposing football teams... Our strategy's unfair:

Make the other coaches paranoid enough they'll think

There's a reason why they got warm Gatorade to drink.

Keep them busy sweeping rooms in case we've planted bugs,

Certain that, if head-sets fail, it's 'cause we've yanked the plugs,

Worried when a fan is taping their team at a game...

Belichick's the Hooded One opponents dare not name.

Critics say New England cheats; they say we break the rules,

Claiming it's the reason why we make them look like fools.

Poor New England cannot win - except for on the field -

Since the haters hide behind the NFL's own shield...

Casting slings and arrows, rumors, allegations - mud

While football's Commissioner is pulling on his pud.

Go ahead.  Suspect us of a myriad of sins

But our crime is, mostly, that New England often wins. 

Shame On U.S.

 

I can't help but be ashamed we haven't done our part

Taking in more refugees from wars they didn't start.

People fleeing terrorism, bombings, drone-strikes - death.

U.S. should be helping more...  I wouldn't hold my breath.

Even though the chaos in the region can be traced

Back to wars we started, that's a fact we haven't faced.

We have a responsibility.  Don't like it? Tough.

Yes we send a lot of AID but that is not enough.

Less than fifteen hundred refugees accepted here.

Europe's seen 360,000 just this year.

U.S. must take its fair share of desperate people, too.

Short of war - again - it is the least that we can do.

Judge Berman for President

Fans can just ignore what all the haters have to say,

Patriots were vindicated...  Brady gets to play.

Judge has ruled the NFL's behavior wasn't fair,

Siding with New England and Tom Brady's case. So there!

His impartial ruling found that four games were too much

For some balls that might be slightly softer to the touch.

'though the NFL's appealed, appeals can take awhile;

Could be years before the case would even come to trial.

I hope Brady sues their ass for what they've put him through,

Making accusations as they robbed him of his due

Of the joy he should have felt, with all his heart and soul,

At New England's victory in last year's Super Bowl.

Unsolicited Advice for Kim Davis: Do Your Job

The Kentucky County clerk, Kim Davis, who refused

Same-sex couples marriage licenses must be confused.

She is newly born-again and may not know the rules;

Jesus preached of love and taught that bigotry's for fools.

Davis, who is thrice divorced - on marriage number four -

(Making her an expert, since she's had so many more)

May not know that Jesus said to love our fellow man;

Do our best to help them out in any way we can.

But, it doesn't matter 'cause Kim's office ain't a church...

Since her actions leave her fellow workers in the lurch,

If she will not do her job for fear she'd be disgraced,

Squeaky wheel should not get oil...  It ought'a be replaced.

The Lesser of Two Evils?

(Image/Courtesy of www.speakeasyfacilitators.co.za)

You might think Republicans - opposed to Hillary -

Should take time to think who their alternative could be.

Hillary conspiracies, the kind that FOX News panders,

Have resulted in a surge for Vermont's Bernie Sanders.

Do they really want a guy who claims he's Socialist

Or a seasoned politician who's a realist?

(FYI: Real Socialists say Bernie isn't one...

That he's more conservative than David Cameron.)

Shouldn't they be worried Mrs. Clinton's in a slump

While their leading candidate's an idiot like Trump?

He is unelectable. Because of him, they'll lose.

I'd think Hillary's the lesser evil they would choose.

Break Time's Over

Though the media declined to take my good advice

I've ignored most politics this summer...  It was nice.

Now that it's September 1st, I fear it's nearly time

To examine Presidential candidates in rhyme.

Sorry, I don't want to ruin anybody's day

But ignoring problems doesn't make them go away.

Just ask the Republicans who have to deal with Trump,

Such a pompous, rude, bombastic, narcissistic chump.

They cannot pretend the Donald isn't polling first;

They can only grin and bear it as he does his worst,

Blathering away without a modicum of tact

Driving off the voters they were hoping to attract.