Boston Red Sox Fans Are Weird.

What?

Red Sox are advancing 'cause, last night, we beat the Rays.

Don't know who we're playing next; the Tigers or the A's.

All we know is we'll be here at home and better rested.

Fans have hopes so high right now, we ought'a be arrested.

Saturday is game one in the A.L. pennant chase.

Either way, whichever team the Red Sox have to face,

They will feel the Fenway Faithful - many with a beard...

Proving to the nation that, up here, we're kinda weird.

I make no predictions 'cause I want the Sox to win.

I don't want to jinx the team before the games begin.

When I write a rhyme about my teams they tend to lose.

You would not take chances either, were you in my shoes.

The 113th Congress - What Kind of Example is This?

Do we want to show the world that we'll negotiate

If the threat is big enough?  Well, isn't that just great?

Less than perfect timing (just to understate the facts)

Threaten world economies until the Congress acts.

With a common enemy the Arab street unites;

We're that common enemy - ignoring sovereign rights.

Two raids into Africa; a city street, a beach...

One man's being questioned but the other's out of reach.

Egypt doesn't like the fact we can't support their coup.

In Afghanistan their President is angry, too.

Karzai says he won't agree to sign a long-term deal

'cause we never stop to ask the Afghans how they feel.

Pakistan and Yemen hate that we use unmanned drones;

All the world is mad the NSA is tapping phones.

Now they get to watch and see our government not work...

Anyone who'd sign up for this kind of thing's a jerk.

Cursed?

The Patriots offense was all wet yesterday. (Photo/AP)

Patriots are 4 and 1; the Sox are 2 and oh.

One team hopes to sweep their series; one team's plagued with woe.

One team is on fire while the other team is damp.

Patriots are struggling; the Sox could be the Champ.

Brady threw no touchdowns yesterday which broke his streak.

52 games in a row; at least one every week...

'though I'm sure that Danny Amendola's very nice,

There's no Joe Montana if you don't have Jerry Rice.

Red Sox are at Tropicana Field to play the Rays

But, though they're more fun to write a rhyme about these days,

I am being very careful - watching what I say -

Just in case my rhyming is affecting how they play.

When I rhymed, extensively, about the Sox last year

They performed so badly that I had begun to fear

I might be responsible - incurred the sports gods' wrath -

And there is no fury like the kind the sports gods hath.

Maybe I should stick to politics and government

'though, the more I think about it, look at how that went.

Maybe Dr. Seussilitis really is a curse...

When I write a rhyme about something it's gotten worse.

Where's the EPA When You Need Them?

(Artwork courtesy of The Simpsons)

G.O.P. wants something from their Shutdown, don't know what;

To defund Obama Care, another budget cut?

One thing that they're sure they want? A little more respect.

They're not getting any lately...  What did they expect?

They could always tune to Bullshit Mountain for some praise.

(That is what Jon Stewart's calling FOX's "news" these days.)

When you hear them tell it, "slimming down" is for the good.

You won't feel the impact in your all-white neighborhood.

They do not support calls for the Tea Party to halt

Shutting down the government (which is Obama's fault.)

Something's in the water there; it's making them insane.

Maybe that's the reason why their programs are inane.

Look at Bill O'Reilly and what happened to Glenn Beck...

By the time he left the place the poor guy was a wreck.

They've become so toxic - spreading anger, fear, and doubt -

It's a shame the E.P.A. is closed and can't help out.

Self-Inflicted Wounds

Just two weeks before another self-inflicted wound...

Will the Congress ransom our economy? Stay tuned.

If they can't agree to raise the ceiling on our debt,

What would happen to us next is anybody's bet.

Never mind the shutdown of our monuments and parks,

Judging by the terror in economists' remarks,

If we do not pay our bills the world's  economy

Slips into recession and commences falling free.

I think it's ridiculous; of course we have to pay.

What has happened to "Full faith and credit" anyway?

Don't they care how many jobs this kind of nonsense kills?

No negotiations needed...  Pay our country's bills.

Dear Congress... Enough Already

(Photo/BRENDAN SMIALOWSKI/AFP Collection)

"No one wants Obama Care," Republicans insist.

Tell that to the millions who attempted to enlist.

There was so much traffic that computer systems crashed...

Signing up for programs that Conservatives have trashed.

Ted Cruz, who's a Senator (and Speaker of the House?)

Lit a fire that's becoming difficult to douse.

We are past the boiling point - which makes for bitter Tea -

Fighting to block health care many want, apparently.

If you couldn't sign up for Obama Care, don't fret;

We're not even close to any deadlines for it yet

(Unlike our economy; it's running out of time...

But I'll save that topic for tomorrow's silly rhyme.)

People at the registries are back at work today;

(Not like furloughed workers who've been told to stay away)

It might still be busy and you may be put on hold...

A.C.A. is popular, despite what we've been told.

Dear Furloughed Federal Employees...

Now you'll have time to read.

To the newly unemployed; the clerks and astronauts,

Forest rangers, nurses who administer flu shots,

Workers at museums, people processing new claims...

Welcome to our ranks as Congress plays its stupid games.

Hope you have some savings put away and it's enough

Since the road to compromise ahead looks pretty rough.

President Obama says the ACA's the law.

Tea Party has disagreed - it's sticking in their craw -

So they've forced their Speaker, a Republican, to flinch.

Want to stop Obamacare...  They're kinda like the Grinch.

(I think that the GOP should read more Dr. Seuss...

Maybe they could learn a thing or two, but what's the use?

Cruz, who read Green Eggs and Ham, appeared to miss the point;

You should try new things before your nose gets out of joint.)

While you're out on furlough, play some golf, enjoy the day,

Or enroll for health care which has opened anyway.