Confessions of a Frazzled and Superstitious Patriots Fan

Only now - on Monday morning - have I caught my breath;

Saturday the Patriots had me half scared to death.

Twice they trailed by 14 points and twice they battled back.

Once or twice I may have let my calm composure crack.

Maybe more than once or twice... I have been known to yell

When it looks as if the football game has gone to hell.

I don't worry that we'll lose, despite the uphill slope;

Belichick and Brady mean that there is always hope.

Don't know why I lose my mind; I know it's just a game

And I know it's impolite to call the ref a name.

Wish I had more self-restraint but, sadly, I do not.

Don't know how much more that I can take.  My nerves are shot.

(Hope this rhyme is not perceived by sports gods as a sin;

That they know I really do appreciate the win.

I don't want to make them angry; that would really suck

Next week when New England plays a quarterback named Luck.)

Unsolicited Advice for Mrs. Ray Rice

Watch the video Mrs. Rice.  Then, get a lawyer. (Photo/NBC News)

TMZ released a tape of Baltimore's Ray Rice;

Video that shows him punching his fiancée - twice.

Fighting in an elevator; with a mighty clout

Ray hit Janay hard enough to knock the woman out.

'though the incident was almost 7 months ago,

It was only yesterday the Ravens let him go.

Said they didn't realize how bad the beating looked.

Thought that, since police released him after he was booked,

Ray's 2 game suspension would be punishment enough...

That teams aren't at fault when players treat their women rough.

I guess girls need video before somebody cares.

(FOX and Friends believe it proves that girls should use the stairs.)

I don't plan to blame the victim - who's now Mrs. Rice -

I'd just like to offer unsolicited advice.

Any man who'd hit a woman isn't worth her time.

She should get a lawyer and sue Ray for his last dime.

How The Grinch Stole Victory

Looks like interference to me. (Photo Courtesy of Brad Barr/USA Today Sports)

Patriots are 10 and 4; New England failed to clinch.

Felt as if Gostkowski was a victim of  the Grinch.

Edelman was awesome; Amendola - not too bad...

Even though he dropped the winning catch he should have had.

Hooman was amazing; made a single-handed grab

But, without the Gronk (I'd like to clone him in a lab)

Brady doesn't have a big receiver who won't care

When there's interference that the refs perceive as fair.

Have to play the Ravens next and that'll be a chore.

Hope New England figures out a better way to score.

With so many members of our team not on the field

Our best hope might be next year; once everyone has healed.

The New England Patriots - A Prayer to the Sports Gods

I told you so. (PhotoCredit/SI)

You can call me crazy (and you wouldn't be the first)

But I've grown convinced that Rob Gronkowski has been cursed.

Why does any athlete tell Sports Illustrated  yes?

For the great majority, their season is a mess.

Gronk is now a casualty; he broke his arm again.

Next we play the Ravens and we're gonna miss him then.

Woodhead also left the game...  (Thank gods there's always Wes.)

The officials blew some calls.  Was that a fumble? Yes.

Even so, New England won and - with a little luck -

We can beat the Ravens (besides, losing now would suck.)

Sports gods, don't you think the price too high for Gronk's mistake?

You can pay us back by giving Belichick a break.

I know that Ray Lewis must be praying to you too

But, although I won't presume to tell you what to do,

I don't ask for miracles...  Just help Bill find a way

To get to the Super Bowl.  This I, most humbly, pray.