Carpe Aestas

 

How is it already August? Wherefore went July?

Is it only me who feels like summer's flying by?

I have not been swimming in the ocean, even once;

Haven't been up to the mountains...  What am I? A dunce?

There are gorgeous beaches less than 40 miles away,

Or a pretty inn in Woodstock where we like to stay.

Why then am I sitting here and writing stupid rhymes?

I should be at Michael's drinking G&Ts with limes.

I don't have a good excuse for sitting here at home.

Need to stop procrastinating; book my trip to Rome,

Grab a bathing suit and get my fanny to the beach...

Carpe diem...  Time to go and practice what I preach.

Consummatum est

'We can't fix Afghanistan so we are going home;'

Words some army's spoken since the days of Ancient Rome.

Afghans have to be the ones who cure the country's ills.

Groups of fundamentalists are holed up in those hills...

'though they take the winters off (because they'd freeze their buns)

When the "fighting season" starts, the men pick up their guns

Then return to home and hearth and shelter with their clan.

It's become a way of life throughout Afghanistan.

We are not the first to have to face this fact of life -

That, in certain regions of the world, there's constant strife -

We are just the latest, though I doubt we'll be the last.

Countries never seem to learn their lessons from the past.

Pope Benedict XVI Stepping Down

(Photo/USAToday.Com)

Benedict the 16th is retiring as Pope;

Says his health and age have made it difficult to cope

With his many duties as the earthly voice of God...

Laying down his crozier (that long and gilded rod),

Taking off his mitre (it's that tall and pointy hat),

Stepping down from Peter's throne.  I can't imagine that.

Popes die in the traces; they are not supposed to quit.

People in the Twitter-sphere have been all over it:

"First time that a German's ever volunteered to leave,"

"Someone poached #exBenedict."  Some Catholics believe

This means that the Church will start to modernize, at last;

Stop discriminating against women...  Not so fast.

If you know the Church at all (as I suspect I do)

You'd know that the Pontif-ex appointed quite a few

Of the Cardinals who will be gathering in Rome

Where they will decide who'll call the Papal Office home.

They may choose a Spanish-speaker or an African;

One thing I can guarantee, however - it's a man.

It would take a miracle if anyone they pick

Says that priests need hearts and souls and faith and not a....  Uhmmm.
Male genitalia.

The Vatican was struck by lightning the night the Pope announced his retirement.  Really.

The Vatican - Are They Crazy?

(Warning: YouTube clip is PG13 and contains
some "Filthy mouths and  bad attitudes.")

First, I'd like to make it clear - I'm not an atheist,

It's only religious dogma I tend to resist.

I believe there's Something...  What It is I cannot tell.

My poor father's pretty sure I'm going straight to Hell.

I was raised a Catholic. I went to Catholic schools.

I'm no longer Catholic; I didn't like their rules.

Why not blame it on the nuns? The Vatican sure does.

Don't like when a Sister will not shut her mouth because

Women are subservient, according to the Church.

Men are meant to rule and nuns are joggling their perch.

I think that's ridiculous. It's past time to ordain

Women. Besides, telling nuns to "Shut up" is insane!

Maybe Rome could look at it like this; As Jesus' spouse,

Nuns should be responsible for cleaning up His House.

It's been looking dirty lately...  Make the Pope a nun.

Give it to a woman when you must get something done.