Sochi - Modern Day Bread and Circuses

Oohhh!  Look at all the pretty balloons at the Opening Ceremonies in Sochi. (Photo/Courtesy of NBC)

So much in the world is tragic - war, disease, and death.

Nations call for changes but I wouldn't hold my breath.

U.N. Human Rights Commission published new reports;

No-one paid attention 'cause we're focusing on sports.

Russia's at the center of the issues of the day,

But it's not just Winter Games that Putin likes to play.

Syria and North Korea count him as a friend.

Without his agreement, neither travesty will end.

Fireworks and "bread and circuses" - like ancient Rome,

Counting all the medals our Olympians bring home -

Easily distracted, we're ignoring basic facts;

Putin is supporting men engaged in criminal acts.

I don't blame the Russian people...  Them, I think I'd like.

I just wish they'd help us tell Assad to take a hike.

As for North Korea (if the Chinese aren't involved)

Send Kim Jong-un Dennis Rodman's drug stash...  Problem solved.

(Graphic/Courtesy of Owned.com)

Happy (Belated) Birthday Kim Jong-un

Check out the expressions on Rodman's team-mates. That's what deer caught in the headlights of a derailed Crazy Train look like. (Photo/CNN)

Happy birthday Kim Jong-un; can't wish you many more...

I suspect that isn't what your future holds in store.

I predict that you won't make it to a ripe, old age;

Just a cameo appearance on the global stage.

Hope you like your birthday present; we call him "the Worm."

When he opens up his mouth he makes his team-mates squirm.

Please feel free to keep him 'cause we do not need him back.

Sorry that he's damaged; it's what comes from smoking crack.

Dear Secretary Kerry... Unsolicited Advice for North Korea

Kim Jong-un keeps ramping up the tensions overseas:

Making plans for bringing Austin, Texas to its knees,

Opening reactors, shutting down a factory,

Threatening to launch a missile if we don't agree.

Seems he wants the sanctions lifted, so he's talking tough.

If the man were rational I'd swear it's all a bluff,

But he doesn't strike me as a very stable guy.

Doesn't seem to care that we could blow Pyongyang sky high.

How are we supposed to deal with someone who's a loon?

Maybe we should send in Dennis Rodman pretty soon.

He can speak the language; he's established a rapport.

Our Marines could land him on the North Korean's shore.

Dennis could explain to Kim Jong-un the basic facts;

Talking tough is one thing, but if North Korea acts,

It will be the Russians and the Chinese who are mad

And they might arrange a swift reunion with his dad.

Across the Pond - Basketball Diplomacy

Ambassador Extraordinaire Dennis "The Worm"  Rodman? (Photo/People)

'though no-one's confirmed him as Ambassador, I heard

Dennis Rodman went to North Korea for a word

With its leader, Kim Jong-un.  They watched some basketball.

Rodman says that we don't understand the guy at all.

Kim Jong-un is "humble" and a "really awesome guy."

Rodman says he's sure of that, and why would Dennis lie?

Says the people love their leader; that's why they parade.

Can't imagine that the North Koreans are afraid...

After all, what's there to fear? (Except for prison camps,

Or the missile tests that they're conducting... Little scamps.

Nuclear explosions and a multitude of threats.)

Rodman says he's peaceful; that's as solid as it gets.

Let's give a portfolio to Dennis Rodman, fast.

Who knows how much longer this diplomacy will last?

Maybe get a pick-up game together.  Putin would;

And I bet Obama could take Kim Jong-un...  He's good.