Pretty Lies

 

I just bought new clothes... They're in a size I haven't worn

Since the days of long ago; before our sons were born.

It's the size I wore before I dated Mr. S.

Clothing sizes changed a lot in 30 years, I guess.

Please don't get me wrong!  I must admit, it was a thrill

When the zipper on the khakis zipped... But, even still!

This is not the body that I had when this size fit

Even if you factor in the saggy, aging bit.

Clothing manufacturers tell us a fairy tale

Easily disproven by the household's bathroom scale.

30 years ago, this size would not get past these hips.

('though that fact may not prevent some future shopping trips.)

Which, of course, is why they do it - tell us pretty lies.

It's more fun to purchase clothing in a smaller size.

But, I'll bet you anything, if I had vintage pants

In this size, the zipper on them wouldn't stand a chance.

Mirror, Mirror On the Wall

 

I've been on a diet and I lost a little weight.

Family and friends have told me that I'm looking great.

I appreciate their compliments but can't agree...

Bathroom mirror tells a very different tale to me.

Numbers on the bathroom scale say I've lost 60 pounds

But the mirror still reflects the way my belly rounds

Into folds of flab and fat - a sad and saggy gut...

'though I will admit I'm not as wide around the butt.

I'm not sure how bad things were; tried not to look before.

Now I wonder how I got my fat ass through the door.

I may not be happy - yet - with what the mirror shows

But, at last, I don't need one of them to see my toes.

Making a Comeback

 

Have a pair of jeans I struggled getting past my hips...

Put them on this morning and - Voila! The zipper zips.

Now they even seem a little baggy 'round the butt;

Evidence of progress from the calories I've cut.

I've still got a lot to lose before I reach my goal

But at least I'm down to just a single belly roll.

Weight's been piling on for years. It's bound to take a while.

(Probably around the time that disco's back in style.

Yoga?

 

I have reached that stage in diets when the scale seems stuck;

When it feels like all your dietary options suck...

No more soda, ice cream, bread and butter, pasta, fudge -

Yet, despite the sacrifices, stupid scale won't budge.

I might have to exercise to get off this plateau,

But I'm so far out of shape I have to take it slow.

I found my Jane Fonda workout from the days of yore,

Put it on our smart TV and cleared space on the floor...

15 minutes into it and I was out of breath,

Had to quit before I exercised myself to death.

Maybe I'll try yoga, although, flexible, I'm not.

Still, it is a place to start and might be worth a shot.