The New England Patriots - Fire Sale!

 

I wish I knew what's been happening inside Gillette:

We don't know the story behind Malcolm Butler yet,

Or if there's a power struggle really going on,

Or if Rob Gronkowski has decided that he's gone.

Amendola, Lewis, Butler, and Nate Solder are;

Jimmy G's in San Fransisco and a rising star.

(I have never liked the fact New England always cuts

Players who deserve a raise for working off their butts.)

I'm aware that there are caps on salaries, but still

If we do not pay them what they're worth, then others will.

This feels like a fire sale where everything must go...

I'll admit that I'm concerned. I haven't panicked though.

This is not the first time and I'm sure it's not the last;

We have gotten through upheavals like this in the past.

With Tom Brady at the helm we'll - once again -adjust.

Just keep on repeating to yourself; "In Bill we trust."

The New England Patriots are #NotDone

 

I'm aware I won't convince the fans of other teams

That they shouldn't mind it when New England's crushed their dreams.

If I'm being honest, I suppose I'd feel the same...

But, you must admit, the Pats deliver quite a game.

With Tom Brady on the field the outcome's not in doubt.

Even when the team is down, you never count them out.

You all get exciting football.  We just get the win.

Oh, no! Did I just commit the sports gods' cardinal sin?

I don't want to taunt nor gloat lest they they exact a toll;

Have to mind my Ps and Qs before the Super Bowl.

We're not done...  The Eagles wait and then, I guess, we'll see.

But you'll get outstanding football...  That, I guarantee.

Another Prayer to the Sports Gods

I still can't believe New England traded Jimmy G.

What will happen if there's - gods forbid! - an injury

To the GOAT, Tom Brady, and it's worse than just a bruise?

I can tell you what will happen then... We're gonna lose.

I'm aware Garoppolo would like a chance to play

As the starting quarterback before he's old and gray.

At the rate that Brady's going, that won't happen here...

Still, I wish the Patriots had waited 'til next year.

I know Belichick's a genius...  Yes, in Bill I trust.

But, it's still a lot to ask some new guy to adjust

To the Pats, where he'd require more than just an arm...

Please dear sports gods, hear my prayer and shelter Tom from harm.

(Not that I am not already praying for the team

But the sports gods haven't listened to me, it would seem,

With so many crucial players on the injured list.)

Still... Good luck Garoppolo! I hope you won't be missed.

Noooo! Not Edelman.

I have got this thing for slot-receivers; guys like Jules.

Edelman, who's one of Brady's most essential tools,

Tore his ACL in Friday night's pre-season game.

Out before I even wore my jersey with his name.

It is a replacement for the one I have for Wes.

Welker left because he pissed off Belichick, I guess.

Up until I got their jerseys, both those men were fine.

Maybe I should not buy jerseys? Could this be a sign?

Even without Edelman, New England's looking good.

If nobody else gets injured I believe we should

Make it to another Super Bowl...  But this I swear;

I'll be much more careful of whose jersey that I wear.

Happy 40th Birthday to the GOAT

 

40 years ago today the Brady's had a son.

At the time I'm sure they didn't know he was the one

Whom the sports gods favored over any other child...

On the day that Tom was born those gods looked down and smiled.

Tom's a gift the sports gods gave to all New England fans;

One that keeps on giving since, apparently, he plans

To go win another ring.  (He'll need a second hand...

Victory parade route is already being planned.)

On this anniversary of that auspicious day,

On behalf of sports fans everywhere, I'd like to say;

Thank you to the sports gods and to Brady's dad and mom.

Thank you to his teams and coaches...  Happy Birthday Tom!

Unsolicited Advice for the Patriots Organization re: Sports Gods

 

I'm afraid the Patriots are angering the gods.

Until a few days ago I liked New England's odds

Of another thrilling season and a Super Bowl.

With this team that seemed to be a reasonable goal.

But it doesn't do to get too cocky early on.

Sports gods disapprove of it and, when that mojo's gone;

Footballs do not spiral through the air the way they should,

Stars get injured, passes dropped, more field goals fall "No good."

When you register a trade-mark on 19 and 0

You insure that's not the way our season's gonna go.

Brady's risked the Madden curse, already,,,  What is next?

Let's not push our luck too far...  We'll make the sports gods vexed.

Tom Brady and The Sports Gods

Nooooo!

What on earth is Brady thinking? Has he lost his mind?

He's agreed to grace the Madden cover...  Is he blind?

What about poor Rob Gronkowski?  What about the curse?

Now he's making jokes about it? That just makes things worse.

Sure!  It's all just fun and games... Until the sports gods strike.

Just the thought of what could happen makes my heart rate spike.

Please Tom, I am begging you to stop (although you scoff)

If I'm right and there are sports gods, you've just pissed 'em off.

Haters Gonna Hate

There is great rejoicing here in each New England town;

Breathing's almost back to normal, heart rate's slowing down.

Soon the rally will be rolling through the Boston streets

Filled with fans who do not care if you think our team cheats.

We get why the fans of other teams must hate our Pats,

Celebrating (yet again) in new tee-shirts and hats.

If we knew there's nothing that our team will ever do

That could match the Patriots, I guess we'd hate them, too.

Sports gods' First Commandment is that fans ought not to gloat

But that rule's suspended when your quarterback's the GOAT.

And real fans of football, even those who curse our name,

Must admit the Patriots delivered quite a game...

Possibly the most amazing game I've ever seen

Since I started watching back at Super Bowl XIX.

We love Belichick and Brady - not for politics -

But because we want Lombardi trophy number 6.

Don't Blame Cincinnati

Cincinnati's Bengals played New England yesterday.

'though they lost to us the thing their record doesn't say 

Is that they are very good...  Much better than I thought.

Problem is, with Brady back, they didn't stand a shot.

The first half was worrisome; poor Tom kept getting sacked

'til Hightower's Safety gave the Pats the spark they lacked.

Once you give Tom Brady any time - at all - to throw

It is nearly certain how the game is gonna go.

Bengals don't play like a team whose record's 2 and 4.

They were better than what is reflected by the score.

'though they lost by 18 points, the Bengals came to play.

It's not their fault they were standing in New England's way.

Lesson Learned

Yesterday, to my dismay, New England lost their game

And, if we are being honest, I'm the one to blame.

'though I knew I, foolishly, continued on undaunted

Violating two sports gods commandments 'cause I taunted.

I confess to gloating, too.  My sins led to our loss.

Patriots were doomed right from the starting coin toss.

Football games take more than skill. You need a lot of luck.

Now I know how Jets fans feel all year... That's gotta suck.

Sorry! Please forgive me sports gods.  I was out of line.

Let the penalty for taunting Jets fans be just mine.

I won't even gloat now that Tom Brady has returned...

I've no wish to risk your wrath.  My lesson has been learned.

Not Taunting... Gloating

(Courtesy of Only In Boston)

P-A-T-S... Pats, Pats, Pats just won against the Jets;

Game was very close (New England didn't cover bets.)

But, despite a fifth of all his passes being dropped,

Brady's proved he's on a mission and will not be stopped.

I won't use the "U" word that's been bandied here-abouts,

I know - in regards to sports gods - people have their doubts

But I, still, remain convinced the sports gods DO exist

And that cockiness is on their Thou Shalt Not Do list.

I'll just count my blessings, with Tom Brady being first.

Thank them for Bill Belichick and pray I haven't cursed

Us before the Dolphins game we're playing Thursday night...

Careful not to boast or make predictions as I write.

Go ahead and call me superstitious if you want

But prior experience has taught me not to taunt.

Still, the sports gods can't begrudge Pats' fans the right to gloat;

Even they must recognize Tom Brady is the GOAT.

Poor Tom Brady

If you've ever doubted or were sitting on the fence,

Unsure whether football injures brains, more evidence

Surfaced when Tom Brady said he'd vote for Donald Trump...

Sacks on my poor quarterback did worse than leave a lump.

Only explanation I can find is CTE:

Chronic and traumatic brain encephalopathy.

If Tom hadn't been concussed, thus damaging his brain,

He would not support the Donald, 'cause that's just insane.

Donald Trump would make a truly, awful President

(Guess we know where hot air from deflated footballs went.) 

We can't blame Tom Brady - still the greatest of all time -

But, what football does to players' brains should be a crime.

Judge Berman for President

Fans can just ignore what all the haters have to say,

Patriots were vindicated...  Brady gets to play.

Judge has ruled the NFL's behavior wasn't fair,

Siding with New England and Tom Brady's case. So there!

His impartial ruling found that four games were too much

For some balls that might be slightly softer to the touch.

'though the NFL's appealed, appeals can take awhile;

Could be years before the case would even come to trial.

I hope Brady sues their ass for what they've put him through,

Making accusations as they robbed him of his due

Of the joy he should have felt, with all his heart and soul,

At New England's victory in last year's Super Bowl.

Damage Done

(Graphic/Courtesy of FOX Business)

I still can't believe a little missing PSI

From a ball results in a suspension for a guy

That exceeds the one he'd get for beating up his wife,

Tarnishing a legacy he's worked for all his life.

Brady says he's innocent.  There's not a shred of proof

This was a conspiracy and not a harmless goof.

Pressure in the football didn't impact Brady's play;

NFL replaced the balls and he won anyway.

I'm glad Tom is fighting back but fear that it's too late...

Thanks to the Commissioner, the haters gonna hate.

Brady's reputation - even though it isn't fair -

Has been damaged by the NFL, beyond repair.

Dear Robert Kraft... That Wasn't Helpful

(Photo/Courtesy of AP via The Boston Herald)

In New England fans are feeling like we got the shaft,

One just driven further in by owner, Robert Kraft.

After meeting fellow owners, he dropped his appeal

But, unless the speculation that he cut a deal -

Took the hit to save Tom Brady - turns out to be true,

Fans are angry...  Feeling it was wrong for him to do.

Since the Wells Report concluded he'd done nothing wrong

And the evidence against Tom Brady isn't strong

 It's seen as admitting that the Patriots are cheats;

That will be our reputation when the team competes.

Non-New England fans have always thought that anyway;

Claiming that we need unfair advantages to play.

Kraft asks fans to trust his judgement in this latest move...

Maybe it's a plan to give the team something to prove?

Most fans think he should have chose to fight the N.F.L.

His capitulation isn't going over well.

Haters Gonna Hate

We, who are New England fans and standing by our team,

Wish we could wake up to find we've had some awful dream;

That the country doesn't think we only have our wins

'cause our Patriots are not above committing sins.

"Hoisted on their own petard; they got what they deserve,"

Say the football fans who think we've got a lot of nerve

Bitching over penalties our team has just received.

More than half the country said they felt they'd been deceived.

It gives fans of other teams a way they can explain

How Tom Brady and New England keep inflicting pain

On whatever team they love as much as I love mine...

And it's why this ball infraction isn't just a fine.

If the Patriots had not, for so long, been so great

We would not be here, but now the haters gonna hate.

Up here, though, we know the next time Brady gets to play

They could give him bricks to throw... He'll crush them anyway.

Burned By The NFL

4 games out for Brady, losing 2 picks from the draft,

Plus a million dollar fine for owner, Robert Kraft.

Seems a bit excessive for a slightly softer ball

Which did not affect the outcome of the game at all.

I believe Tom Brady likes a lower psi.

(Just like Aaron Rodgers prefers his ball pressure high.)

 Like the teams who warm their balls, perhaps Tom gained an edge

Though, without the proof, the Wells Report could just allege.

Worse than all the penalties the NFL's imposed?

Calls the 1st round ballot to the Hall of Fame be closed

To the greatest quarterback who's ever played the game

Who, unlike some other football players I could name,

Never beat a woman up or killed another guy

Never shot up steroids, not accused of getting high,

Doesn't hit his children - yet his reputation's shot.

That's what's worse than any punishments New England got.

All this vitriol against Tom Brady isn't fair.

He could take a living pig and throw it through the air

Spinning in a perfect spiral if he wanted to.

NFL has robbed him of the legacy he's due.