Go Vote!

 

I'll be glued to coverage of the returns tonight,

Hoping that the country will impose some oversight

On a President who's been behaving like a troll.

This mid-term election is about our country's soul.

Here it is...  November 6th, and I've already voted.

Turnout was much higher than I've previously noted:

Younger voters who don't normally participate,

Brand new voters at the polls deciding their own fate.

It's unprecedented in a mid-term that we see

Hordes of people taking part in their democracy.

Pollsters are reluctant to predict the tighter races

Because lines are out the door at many polling places.

Hopefully this indicates a Democratic wave;

Citizens who feel this country's worth the fight to save

From the demagoguery we've been subjected to.

It's a referendum on what is and isn't true.

Happy 21st Birthday Darlin'!

 

We do not have children now...  Both sons are young adults.

We've been raising them for years; we're thrilled with the results.

Youngest son turns 21 today... There'll be a crowd;

Family who love him and the parents he's made proud.

Sitting here - remembering the day that he was born -

Looking back on all the years and trying not to mourn

For the end of childhood and the turning of a page,

Starting a new chapter as we reach this milestone age.

Going out for Mai Tais - which he swears will be his first...

Maybe so, although I'm pretty sure he's quenched his thirst

On a beer or two or six before but, what the hell,

If he's happy and his college grades are doing well?

This is it! Your time to shine, my darlin'... Have some fun.

Happy Birthday - and a few suggestions for you son:

Take it easy when in pubs and don't debate a punk.

Call an Uber and remember - No one likes a drunk.

Hurricane Florence

Image courtesy of ABC News.

Florence is a "monster;" she's a Category 4.

Both the Carolinas braced for when she comes ashore.

Mass evacuations all along the southern coast.

Residents who try to ride it out at home are toast.

Florence isn't like the other hurricanes we've seen

And she's gonna hang around the region, which will mean

Rain they're measuring in feet with flooding in its wake.

Choosing to ignore the warnings is a huge mistake.

Stock up on supplies; check on your neighbors if they're old.

Please stay safe...  Evacuate if that's what you've been told.

Do not risk yourself - or others - leaving things to fate.

Get yourself to higher ground before it gets too late.

Dear Sports Gods; Definitely Not Gloating!

 

I am being very careful as regards my Sox

Because I am superstitious, which my husband mocks.

He does not believe in sports gods; said they're just a joke.

I bet that his Yankees wish he'd thought before he spoke.

Red Sox are so far in front of other baseball teams

They've exceeded even Fenway Faithful's wildest dreams...

But, I'm trying not to gloat before the play-offs start

Knowing that it risks the sports gods breaking Boston's heart.

Go ahead and laugh it up! Feel free to talk some trash...

Don't believe me! Then, when all your sports dreams turn to ash,

I won't say I told you so (that makes the sports gods mad)

But I will be thinking it...  And gloating, just a tad.

Shakespeare Revisited

 

"Something's rotten in the State of Denmark," Shakespeare said...

Then, in just a few short acts, the whole damn cast is dead.

As our current tragedy unfolds - the play undone -

I'm afraid our State will end up like that other one.

Men and women merely players; all the world a stage.

Our mad king's soliloquies are on his Twitter page.

Something isn't only rotten here...  It stinks like hell.

Alas for our democracy.  I thought I knew it well.

Methinks I doth smell a rat.  Its name is Donald Trump;

An Othello with the intellect of Forrest Gump.

In this comic tragedy we're in, perhaps it's best

If a flight of federal agents sing him to his rest.

Happy 23rd Birthday Darlin'

Our son says nobody likes you when you're 23...

I suspect he's quoting Blink 182 at me.

Since our eldest will be turning 23 today,

Want to tell him he should not believe a word they say.

I know lots of people who think he is pretty great;

Funny, smart, and handsome and, on this auspicious date,

As we celebrate another birthday with our son,

We hope he discovers 23 is lots of fun.

It's an age when you're considered one of the adults;

Old enough your education's showing some results,

Young enough you haven't started dragging your caboose

But, when you screw up, you still have youth as an excuse.

Hate to disagree but Blink 182 is wrong;

Twenty-three's the perfect age, so don't believe their song. 

It's your year for doing all the things that you enjoy...

Trust your mom on that and Happy Birthday darlin' boy.

Carpe Aestas

 

How is it already August? Wherefore went July?

Is it only me who feels like summer's flying by?

I have not been swimming in the ocean, even once;

Haven't been up to the mountains...  What am I? A dunce?

There are gorgeous beaches less than 40 miles away,

Or a pretty inn in Woodstock where we like to stay.

Why then am I sitting here and writing stupid rhymes?

I should be at Michael's drinking G&Ts with limes.

I don't have a good excuse for sitting here at home.

Need to stop procrastinating; book my trip to Rome,

Grab a bathing suit and get my fanny to the beach...

Carpe diem...  Time to go and practice what I preach.

Peanut Butter and Chocolate Chip Cookie Recipe

 

I have got a cookie recipe that's quite a hit.

Only problem I've encountered is I'm writing it

With this rhyming bug of mine so, do excuse me, please...

Seussilitis ain't ideal for sharing recipes:

Place 2 sticks of softened butter in a mixing bowl.

Add a cup of packed brown sugar. Crack in 2 eggs (whole)

Plus another cup of  sugar (granulated, white)

And 1 cup of peanut butter.  Blend 'til smooth and light.

1 and one half teaspoons baking soda. Then add 1

Teaspoon baking powder, half of salt (You're almost done.)

2 and one half cups of flour; bag of chocolate chips.

Mix, then chill the cookie dough (and wave good-bye to hips.)

Roll the dough into a ball and then in sugar, too.

Place the balls on cookie sheets and grab a fork, then you

Press down. Put them in the oven (350) to bake

For 10 minutes... Couldn't be much easier to make.

Ruining a Perfectly Nice Walk

I've been on the golf course twice this year...  It wasn't good.

I am old and out of practice; shanked my 7 wood.

Couldn't hit my driver straight - the ball kept going right,

Sailing off into the trees or rough and out of sight.

"Why would you keep playing golf?" I hear you asking me.

And, I must confess that it's a total mystery

Why someone would play a game that damages the soul...

Unless you have felt the joy of birdying a hole.

Once you've sunk a tricky putt or hit a pretty shot,

Playing "in the zone" - it is not easily forgot.

Which is how the golf gods suck you in but, once you are,

They will make you pay in sweat and tears for every par.

Pretty Lies

 

I just bought new clothes... They're in a size I haven't worn

Since the days of long ago; before our sons were born.

It's the size I wore before I dated Mr. S.

Clothing sizes changed a lot in 30 years, I guess.

Please don't get me wrong!  I must admit, it was a thrill

When the zipper on the khakis zipped... But, even still!

This is not the body that I had when this size fit

Even if you factor in the saggy, aging bit.

Clothing manufacturers tell us a fairy tale

Easily disproven by the household's bathroom scale.

30 years ago, this size would not get past these hips.

('though that fact may not prevent some future shopping trips.)

Which, of course, is why they do it - tell us pretty lies.

It's more fun to purchase clothing in a smaller size.

But, I'll bet you anything, if I had vintage pants

In this size, the zipper on them wouldn't stand a chance.

The New England Patriots - Fire Sale!

 

I wish I knew what's been happening inside Gillette:

We don't know the story behind Malcolm Butler yet,

Or if there's a power struggle really going on,

Or if Rob Gronkowski has decided that he's gone.

Amendola, Lewis, Butler, and Nate Solder are;

Jimmy G's in San Fransisco and a rising star.

(I have never liked the fact New England always cuts

Players who deserve a raise for working off their butts.)

I'm aware that there are caps on salaries, but still

If we do not pay them what they're worth, then others will.

This feels like a fire sale where everything must go...

I'll admit that I'm concerned. I haven't panicked though.

This is not the first time and I'm sure it's not the last;

We have gotten through upheavals like this in the past.

With Tom Brady at the helm we'll - once again -adjust.

Just keep on repeating to yourself; "In Bill we trust."

Arming Sister Margaret!

If the GOP agrees to sticking out their necks:

Call for comprehensive, universal background checks,

Give police authority to take somebody's gun,

Raise the legal age to purchase them to 21,

I think we should let the teachers in a school decide

If they want to have a loaded pistol by their side...

If they did - and if they're trained on how to use their guns -

I'm prepared to compromise and let them arm the nuns.

(Sister Margaret was armed... She had her rosary.

She'd begin to swing those beads when she was mad at me.

With that heavy, metal cross that dangled from the end

She was not a woman you would argue with, my friend.)

'though, not everyone is Sister Margaret - Thank God! -

My sons had two State cops coach their Varsity Wrestling squad;

I'd trust guys like them with guns if they brought them to school.

I would make that bargain any day...  I'm not a fool.

If the President's sincere and starts to back away

From positions long supported by the NRA

I think that he'd see his polls dramatically increase.

He would have my full support...  Will wonders never cease?

Dear Tina... I DID Warn You, Right?

Really?

I have a step-sister and I like her very much;

We have met a few times now; we try to keep in touch.

Mostly it's through Facebook but I'm noticing, of late

She has started "liking" posts of symbols that I hate. 

Saw her just the other day (both parents have been ill;

She flew up to stay and help...  They're lucky that she will.)

We met at the Rehab - where I fear that I was rude -

Said I thought hers was an idiotic attitude.

She and I both took an oath and swore that we'd protect

And defend this country...  Therefore, with all due respect,

Why on earth would she choose to support another flag?

It's a hurtful, racist symbol, I began to nag.

"That's not what it stood for," she politely disagreed.

She said it meant something else before the slaves were freed.

Maybe so, but that IS what it symbolizes now.

Then I asked why she'd post Southern symbols anyhow?

Both of us are from the North...  I couldn't see the sense,

With the situation in society so tense,

Why she'd "like" the battle flag of rebels from the South

I'm afraid I lectured her...  I couldn't shut my mouth.

On and on, until the poor girl's eyes began to glaze:

False flag operations and the tricks that Putin plays.

Once I got to Sanskrit symbols used in ancient art

I could tell she wasn't gonna have a change of heart.

Looks as if we two must both agree to disagree,

'though I warned her she might still get snarky posts from me.

But, I'd best be careful not to make her really mad;

Not when she's the one who's down there, taking care of Dad.

Christmas Music in November Is Bad for Your Health

 

Recent scientific research proves that I've been right

All along when I've insisted that "Oh, Holy Night,"

"Dominic the Donkey," "Jingle Bells," and "Drummer Boy"

In November makes you sick instead of filled with joy.

Yes, I'm feeling "Bah humbug-ish."  Sure... You're all prepared;

Decorated, presents bought and wrapped while carols blared.

All this Christmas music in November makes me tense

Since I haven't done a thing...  I mean you no offense

But, I need 2 weeks (at least) before I'm in the mood.

Right now, I can understand the Grinch's attitude.

I'm glad all you Whos are happy - jingling away -

Me? I'd like some "Peace on Earth" until the holiday.

Have We No Shame?

 

As the list of women who've accused Judge Roy Moore grows,

Some in Alabama's GOP have hit new lows.

They still plan to cast their ballots for a pedophile

Rather than a Democratic moderate...  How vile.

One guy used the Bible, claiming Mary was a teen,

Joseph was an adult...  Jesus Christ! I feel unclean.

Others tried to weasel out by saying that "if true"

Then Moore needs to step aside - which he's refused to do.

Have we really reached the point where people will excuse

Child abuse from Senate candidates who share their views?

Please tell me that there are still some standards that we keep...

If not, then we're truly lost and I can only weep.

#DNFTT

Knowing that the Russians have been weaponizing memes

With results that far exceeded Putin's wildest dreams

Leads me to a question that's been haunting me with doubt;

Is my opposition only helping Putin out?

Once I thought the worst damage had already been done -

On the morning I discovered Donald Trump had won;

Sowing seeds of bigotry, discord and discontent,

Which has only gotten worse since he's been President.

But, the fact that Trump has demonstrated he's a jerk

Doesn't mean that Russian trolls are not still hard at work

Judging by the Senate testimony from this week...

Ship of State is foundering - no paddle - up the creek.

Twitter couldn't tell our Senators how many "bots"

Might be on their service, echoing each others' thoughts.

Facebook isn't sure how many rubles Russia paid

Buying ads to influence decisions voters made.

Now we've gotten to the point where how somebody votes

Turns into a culture war aimed at each others' throats.

We all need to take a breath and find some common ground...

And remember Putin's Russian trolls are still around.

Another Prayer to the Sports Gods

I still can't believe New England traded Jimmy G.

What will happen if there's - gods forbid! - an injury

To the GOAT, Tom Brady, and it's worse than just a bruise?

I can tell you what will happen then... We're gonna lose.

I'm aware Garoppolo would like a chance to play

As the starting quarterback before he's old and gray.

At the rate that Brady's going, that won't happen here...

Still, I wish the Patriots had waited 'til next year.

I know Belichick's a genius...  Yes, in Bill I trust.

But, it's still a lot to ask some new guy to adjust

To the Pats, where he'd require more than just an arm...

Please dear sports gods, hear my prayer and shelter Tom from harm.

(Not that I am not already praying for the team

But the sports gods haven't listened to me, it would seem,

With so many crucial players on the injured list.)

Still... Good luck Garoppolo! I hope you won't be missed.

Dear Bill; Go to Hell. Sincerely, God

Bill O'Reilly's "mad at God" for screwing up his life.

Said God "worked him over..." Wow - the irony is rife.

Six times that O'Reilly's claimed that he was not at fault.

He thinks only God can stop a sexual assault.

God has disavowed responsibility for Bill;

Chasing 6 forbidden fruits - he exercised free will.

So, to Bill (and other predators we all could name)

God wants him to find some other deity to blame.

Sports gods took a knee and said that Bill can take a hike.

Bill could claim the devil made him do it, if he'd like.

Then he could feel right at home, with all the other trolls,

And I hear Hell's always in the market for new souls.